Harnesses

These are designs I’ve personally tried for making harnesses

I’ll leave it up to you, dear reader, to judge length of strings and elastics having read this, since I have no idea what your build is like

I don’t seem to be able to find the website I was looking for, so please do comment if you know what I’m thinking of when I give these instructions for the first design

Please remember this is not my idea, this one, and I take no credit for it!

The Elastic

Quite simple really, you make an elastic belt that can go down under your hips, around you, and tuck the balls of the packer behind it.

You then take another length of elastic, and tie both ends of it to the belt round your hips, leaving a looped “tail” hanging behind you.

You take the tail, pull it through your legs, and the loop goes over the top of the packer

I found this one worked well with this DIY packer but didn’t work with the one I bought for STP modification at all, so would eventually advise against it.

The String

This is the one I’m using at the moment. and it is quite complex to make, needing string and a cock ring tight enough to fit securely onto the packer. Many thanks to cheetr from #gaygeeks on irc.freenode.net for coming up with what knots I’d need to put it together

Take a length of string and tie it round below your hips with a reef knot.

Take the cock ring and two shorter lengths of string, and dangle the cock ring where you want it to hang, tying it twice from the hip strap, again using reef knots (simple to tie, easy to undo and alter)

Take a length of string (a long one) and use a taut line hitch (I used the #1857) to attach it to one side, so it hangs down the outside of your thigh.

Repeat on the other side.

Now take the long dangly bit (no pun intended) and wrap it round your thigh, outside to inside, passing through the cock ring, before using the same taut line hitch to attach the loose end to the bit coming down from the waistband.

Yes, confusing I know

You’ll know when you have this right because the cock ring will be taut, and you’ll be able to adjust its position by moving straps around slightly

The Sock

I liked this method when I was just packing with a heavier, bought packer, but it doesn’t work with an STP device

Take a sports sock

Cut two small holes in the top hem

Run a piece of elastic through these

Tuck the shaft in the sock, under the elastic, with the balls dangling out the back

Tie the elastic round your waist

PANTS

This one creates a lot of washing mind

Get two sets of boxers (you’ll be wearing two pairs per day now)

One needs to be tiny, just big enough to pull up, and the other normal (I wear boys 5-6 and boys 14-15 for this)

Put the little boxers on with the balls inside and the shaft dangling out the front hole

Put the big boxers on over the little boxers and the shaft is tucked inside those

And thus concludes todays post on such matters!

Part Two of the STP Saga!

So, I shall presume that you all know what an STP is by now, and talk from that standpoint!

The pictures in the gallery below should show you the process that I used to do this, but since I can’t work out how to put them individually, you’ll have to browse.

How to bake a STP

Ingredients

One Packer

One metre of 5mm diameter tubing (bought in a medium size Robert Dyas for about £2)

One teat for a baby bottle (bought in a medium size Boots for about £2)

One reel of duct/gaffa tape (bought in a small Robert Dyas for about £6)

Materials

One skewer (not corkscrew) as used for barbequing

Alternatively one long tent peg

One stove (gas was used)

One cold water tap

One pair of scissors

One marker pen

One stopwatch

Method

1. Put the kettle on and lay out cups of tea
2. Take the marker pen and mark on the tip of the penis and back of the ballsack the rough line you wish the hole to pass through
3. Pour the hot water over the teabags
4. Heat the skewer or tent peg over the stove on high heat for a minute. Be sure to leave a part of it far enough away from the heat to be grasped. Use the stopwatch to time this
5. Hold the packer securely and slip the red-hot metal through it, from tip down shaft and out ballsack. It goes very fast if you are not careful, and melts very very easily, so go as slowly as you need to to ensure the line you have is at least roughly the line you wished to have
6. Rush to a tap  and remove the skewer, pulling the edges of the holes apart, thrusting your hands into the packer down the hole, and turning it inside out if necessary to ensure that the hole goes right through smoothly. Leave it in cold water for 1-2 minutes
7. Take the teabags out, add milk and sugar to taste and start drinking
8. Wash up the skewer, turn the stove off
9. Take the tubing and the teat. Cut the end off the teat in a very small way, and feed the tube into this. Use the duct or gaffa tape to secure this very securely. It comes off otherwise, and the tape struggles to stick to the smooth rubber of the teat so use LOTS
10. Feed the tubing from the other end down the cock, leaving a tiny bit sticking out at the tip end, and enough at the ball end to bend it down and have the cup hanging lower than the bottom of the balls
11. Trim to taste
12. Rush to the toilet having drunken so much tea, and test it out

Yes, this method does work contrary to my first post where it very very clearly failed. The timings should also make a perfect cup of tea. Try the packer for the first time naked in the shower (you will drip) and get very used to using it without clothes before you add clothes. After that get very used to using it with clothes before you start using it in public!

I will include instructions for a couple of types of harness tomorrow, probably, and the day after will try and write something about how and when to use or not use this marvellous device!

To my reader(s!)

To my first reader, Will, thanks for reading, and commenting and such!

To my second reader, and much loved boyfriend Moof, HAPPY BIRTHDAY

Yes, yes, it is his birthday! and he is fabulous and wonderful and so he gets a post

Ooh and I have all the bits to make my STP take two tomorrow, which means, sadly, no video, but lots of pictures, I promise!

(ps, don’t let me on wordpress past midnight, it is a Bad Idea)

Part One of the STP Saga!

Now playing: Manic Street Preachers – Journal for Plague Lovers / Journal for Plague Lovers

(yes, that was a plug, no, it won’t happen often, yes they are my favourite band, yes you need to hear this album, yes it is relevant to gender issues)

Now, the saga
I’ve tried a few various methods to make a working STP (device enabling female genitalia to urinate standing tidily), the most effective being cutting the nose of a plastic bottle off at a 45 degree angle, putting the cap on, boring a hole in the cap, and sticking the pointy bit inside me and pissing, but that’s obviously not very realistic (unless you know many cisguys with clear plastic penises? I thought not). I also couldn’t pack with it. Now, what I really want is one packer that I can piss, pack and play with, but I have a hands on side so I’m also determined to make it. To those ends I gathered some equipment together:

Two nipples for baby bottles

One metre of plastic tubing sold in car shops for screen fluid

One cyberskin packer

One skewer

One tap

One gas stove

I say I’m a hands-on guy, yes, but I never claimed to be any good at hands on type stuff, so it didn’t work. The plan was to heat the skewer on the gas stove and thrust it, with as little effort and drama as possible, through the packer, before running cold water down the hole to seal it, then running the tube through, poking a hole in the bottle nipple, putting the tube into the hole and tada, one STP device. However, my cunning plan failed quite drastically due to a few major mistakes

1) Not heating the skewer enough so it took a few hard throusts to make any hole, then not realising when it was properly hot, thrusting too hard, and at the wrong angle, so it came out the bottom of the penis before going back in. Yes. Success. Clearly.

2) Not running cold water through for long enough

3) Not finding a way of sealing the nipple to the tubing

4) Choosing too thin a tube with the result of it needing me to piss verrrrrrrrrry sloooooooooooooowly

5) Getting so startled about actually having a penis in my reflection that I dropped the whole caboodle.

I’ve ordered a new one (hence why there can be a Part Two) and am going to try again with a wider tube, longer time and a hotter skewer because I want this to work. When this is done I need to work out how to modify it so that I can play with it as well as pissing and packing! At the moment I have another satisfyingly realistic one for play but it’s a bit of a mood-killer (“Hang on while I put my penis on”) so I want to solve that little problem somehow. Somehow being the operative word, I’m really not sure how I’m going to get this to work, but there has to be a way. As I don’t really want to post pictures of a scarred and mutilated attempt there will be pictures (and a video if I have my ASUS eeebook back from the repair people) on Thursday!